Why Goal Setting Isn't Working for You & What to Do Instead

Paden Bhutia
Aug 20
6 min read

Updated: Sep 5

Are you still setting goals for yourself in 2025 and finding it difficult to work on those goals?

If setting goals were enough and you had to only set goals, then every single person would be able to achieve their goals. But you and I both know that isn’t how it is.

If you are tired of setting goals and would rather achieve those goals, stick around because I’ll be sharing one thing you can start doing that’ll help.

You'll know exactly what to do instead of just doing a goal-setting exercise, so let’s get into it!

The Struggle

Every self-help book I’ve read so far (and I’ve read a lot of them) suggests that you write down your goals.

Of course, this is a good and valid suggestion, but this is only the first part.

Some people may get stuck on this part. They may get into the habit of simply writing down their goals and believe that they’re getting clearer and that’ll help them.

In my experience, writing down goals is a great starting place. I even believe that putting your desires on paper can boost your confidence levels. But this is the extent to which I take it.

The second critical part is working on what you’ve written down. This is where you put in your efforts. I don’t believe you have to struggle and put in the effort. I’ve made a whole video on why I think struggling with your goals is unnecessary. You can check that out later if you like.

Also, if you’d like to improve your habit of being consistent with your life goals, you’ll love the Become Consistent challenge. This is a 3-week online challenge designed to help you gain momentum in working on your life goals.

Become Consistent with working on your life goals

What Works Instead of Just Goal-Setting?

Over the years, I’ve come across several clients who’ve told me that they’ve tried setting goals but still find it difficult to work on them.

Whenever I meet this type of client, I always ask them what they are doing to achieve their goals.

I ask them for cold, hard evidence of exactly what steps they’ve taken to move toward their stated goals. It’s fascinating that every single time, the person has been unable to provide a list of concrete steps they’ve taken.

This isn’t a judgment on someone who is well-intentioned and wants to achieve their goals but somehow is unable to take concrete actions.

To give you a personal example, for years I struggled with emotional stress eating. I would eat every single time I felt low, discouraged, or hurt. Once the emotion passed, I would swear I’d never engage in stress eating again. But soon after, I would find myself stress eating again. It was a catch-22 situation. I would say I didn’t want to overeat or stress eat, but I wasn’t doing anything concrete to break that negative habit.

I remember writing a lot about wanting to stop, but if someone were to ask me what I was doing to break that habit, I didn’t have any evidence that I truly wanted to get out of it.

The Awakening

It was only when I started applying coaching techniques to myself that I was able to break that negative habit, among several others.

It’s been years since I’ve completely gotten rid of the need to eat away my feelings. Now, I can process difficult emotions healthily.

Through my experience, I’ve learned that you can have the best intentions of wanting to do something, such as break a negative habit or cultivate a new one. But unless you take concrete steps, it’s not going to happen.

There’s a powerful quote that always reminds me of this truth: “Intention always takes a beating without action.”

After struggling for years, I created a simple method that works for me every time I want to apply my intention and get things done.

If you’re struggling to get out of a negative habit, remember it’s about being consistent with your efforts. If you need my help with that, you’ll benefit from the Become Consistent challenge.

The Transformation

For me, the simplest way to work on your goals is to use something I call the O.R.S method. And I’m not referring to the oral rehydration drink here, but it could be for your goals, if you think about it.

Okay, jokes aside, let’s get into the O.R.S method of working on goals.

Step One: Observation

You are going to observe everything you’re currently doing regarding your goals. It looks like this:

Let’s say you want to start a side hustle while working a full-time job. You’ve been writing about starting this side hustle and thinking about it for weeks! But when you get honest about what you've been doing to move towards this goal, you’ve done nothing. Observing your actions toward your goals is not an easy task.

For one, you may start judging yourself when you realize that you haven’t done anything substantial to move toward your goals.

If you start judging yourself for the actions you haven’t taken, it can cause you to spiral into negativity and doubt. This is something we want to avoid. The purpose of the observation technique is to get an objective and honest look at whether your desires and actions are aligned.

If you notice that what you want to achieve and your actions are aligned, then keep going; that’s fantastic!

However, if you notice that what you say you want and what you’re doing isn’t aligned, then instead of beating yourself up, use that moment as an opportunity. Assess whether you truly want to do what you’ve been saying or if it’s just a ‘nice to want’. Either way, don’t judge yourself for whatever you realize in that moment of observation. What is true for you will be revealed to you during this process.

Step Two: Reflection

Once you’ve taken a good look, spend about 10 minutes sitting quietly with your goal. Reflect on the progress you’ve been making. What comes up for you? Are you able to see clearly the steps you’re taking to move toward your goals? Can you see the daily and weekly progress you’re making? Or do you see that you’ve hardly done anything concrete to move you toward your goals?

Once you have this data, I want you to question two things:

a. Is this goal truly important to you? How will you know? If it’s been a while and you haven’t done anything about it, and you don’t even think about it for days, then maybe this goal isn’t as meaningful to you.

b. Ask yourself, do you want to continue with it, or is it time to release it? You’ll know this intuitively.

This reflection step is deeply personal, and only you can decide what’s right for you.

Final Step: Support Your Goal

If you’ve decided to continue with this goal or even choose a new one, write down what actions you’ll be taking toward that goal.

Here’s an example: if you say you want to start a side hustle, stop writing down something vague like "start a side hustle." Instead, write down:

What side hustle do you want to start and by when?
Create a business plan.
Create a prototype.
Create a website.
Launch plan.

Listing down what actions you’ll take and by when is a much better approach than simply writing down what you want to achieve.

Next, to support your goal, seek expert help. This can mean taking a class, signing up for a course, getting a consultation, or anything that’ll help you take action toward your goals.

Finally, keep a log of the concrete things you do daily. This way, when you face challenges, you’ll know you’re taking tangible steps toward your goals. The challenges won’t distract you as much.

The Result

This method works better than simply writing down your goals.

I believe that if you aren’t making that goal front and centre in your life, then no matter what you say, that goal isn’t as meaningful to you. And there’s nothing wrong with that. You either will make time to work on it, or you’ll make an excuse; you can’t do both!

That brings us to the end of this episode. Comment below and tell me what goals you’re currently working on. I’d love to hear from you and cheer you on!

If you’re ready to become more consistent with your life goals, the Become Consistent challenge can help you get into the groove of working on your life goals.